"Strength doesn't come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things that you once thought you couldn't."-Rikki Rogers
Hi everybody. Just when I thought that I had this whole thing figured out that's called "long distance running" I have a day like I did last Sunday. It was different. It was familiar. It was scary. It was comforting. It was a day that's difficult for me to comprehend, lest put into words. But, if there ever was an event to solidify my belief that everyday people can accomplish the impossible, it was that day. So it's worth trying to put into words.
As most of you who read this blog know, I was extremely disappointed to have to drop out of this year's running of my hometown marathon in Rochester, NY due to a nasty case of peroneal tendonitis in my right foot. The race that's become Rochester was my very first marathon and I've proudly run in every year's race for the last seven years. Through the years I've learned much about myself as well as that course. It's like an old friend that I visit every summer. I could run the route blindfolded if I had to. I know every turn, hill and water stop. After officially dropping out I remember feeling utterly defeated. I was a distance runner. I ran a marathon every year for the last 10. Sometimes even two a year! It was who I was. The prospect of not racing 26.2 miles at all this year sat atop my shoulders like a 2600.2 pound elephant wearing snug running shorts.
Thankfully, through smart rehab, a good podiatrist and an amazing chiropractor I was able to resurrect what was left of my shot at running a marathon later this year. Unfortunately, Rochester was still out of the question after missing out on two solid months of regular marathon training. I scoured the internet and discovered the Empire State Marathon in Syracuse, NY. Lots of pluses about that race. It was only a little over an hour away from home, cost around the same as Rochester and held during a time frame that I thought I could theoretically train up to.
But, the mind is a terrible thing when you're coming off a running injury. Lots of doubts. When talking to an older friend last year about my 40th birthday this year, they adamantly told me that my running days were coming to an brisk end and that in their experience, EVERYTHING started to go downhill after the big 40. I laughed in their face. I was a runner for God's sake! I wasn't going to break that easy just because of two measly little numbers. Sitting there staring at the register button on Empire's website, I ate every last one of those laughs from that conversation. Things were definitely looking like I was on the downhill slope of old age running decline. To date, I've never been injured so much in one year of running! What the hell?
Like most people, I don't like change. And I certainly didn't want to change to a race and course that I was completely unfamiliar with. After all, I managed to finally break the four hour mark last year in Rochester and this year I was looking forward to trying to do it again. But, it looked like at the time that a sub four hour time just wasn't going to happen this year. Besides, the 366 Project meant emphasis on falling in love with the act, not the race this year. And with the injury's little speed bump, my training was sporadic at best when compared to last year's perfect training season. I even managed to gain seven of the 27 pounds I'd shed back. "Click" Empire it was. I thought to myself, I'll just be happy to get to the starting line healthy and injury free. I did the sub four hour time. I kept telling myself that I didn't need to do it again. It took so much dedication and sacrifice last summer. It was probably not something I could ever do again.
Time to reorganize and get back to business. I threw myself back into a modified training plan at what was left of my season. It was ambitious. It was dirty. It was ugly. Like I said, work commitments and yet another injury, stupid hamstring, made it sporadic. My marathon pace that I so easily clocked every mile training last year left me breathless and exhausted now. The three 20 mile long distance runs noted in last year's running log became just one 16 miler with walk breaks in this year's log. Things were not looking very good. In my experience, running is a lot like life. What you put into it, you get out. All of my lackluster training was going to directly affect the race. In past years with similar shitty training, it turned my marathon into Mark's death shuffle instead of a race. Much suffering.
I refocused and managed to somehow nail the last three weeks of my training plan verbatim. The hamstring strain though, was still there. My chiropractor flat out told me that I shouldn't run Empire. I managed to get my primary doctor to give me a prescription for Prednisone. It helped a little. But, didn't give me the relief that I really needed. Dammit, I was doing this race, injury or not!
As I covered in my pre race report, the trip over to Syracuse was beautiful with Fall foliage in full bloom and more importantly, quick. The expo was fairly decent. And the hotel was better than I expected. I ate a nice dinner with my family who tagged along to watch me suffer the next day for 26.2 miles. Went to bed early. There was nothing else to be done to make this any better than it could be.
After running Rochester for so long, I've taken for granted how nice is it to sleep in your own bed, wake up race morning, eat your own pre long run breakfast and drive 20 minutes to the start line. Man, that's a really nice convenience! I didn't sleep as good as I would've liked. Don't get me wrong, the bed was comfortable. But, I kept worrying that my iPhone alarm and the hotel room alarm weren't going to go off on time. I woke up around 2 AM and even moved my wake up time up by a half an hour to make sure I had enough time to get ready. Only I can make something as simple as sleeping stressful before a race!
I showered, shaved and drove over to a Dunkin Doughnuts across the street for a coffee and wheat bagel with peanut butter. I know. They say not to drink coffee before marathons. I do. I'll even take D & D instead of Starbucks if the situation is drastic enough. There wasn't a Starbucks around. It was a drastic morning. So, D & D it was.
I was happy to see that the cold rain of the night before and 80% chance of rain showers forecasted for the day were gone. It was going to be the coldest marathon I've ever run with clear skies and mid 40's. But, I felt decent and had packed just the right type of running clothing for warm and cold running.
The hotel had a courtesy shuttle running to get runners to the start line. Running two previous NYC marathons has taught me that anytime you can take the stress of getting to the start line off your back, it makes for a much more relaxed experience. It was the last shuttle before the official full marathon start time at 7:30 AM. The driver was prompt and I was amazed to hear him talk about how some runners scheduled for earlier shuttle runs who got down to the lobby five minutes late complained that he left without them. Really? You're five minutes late? How hard is it to get down from the third floor to the lobby?
On the way I chatted with the only other runner on the shuttle. She was an older marathoner who'd originally registered to run the full. But, dropped to the half because of a hamstring injury. Hearing that sent me into a little panic. Christ! I've had the same injury and was still stubbornly planning on limping through the full. I tried to push those self doubts away. But, they stuck with me through the entire race.
We got to the start line with lots of time to spare. It was right outside of some stadium. Lots of great parking if you were lucky enough to drive there. There was little to no wind cover in the parking lot. The winds had picked up overnight as the rain disappeared. Oh, how I longed for a nice warm car! I huddled with some of the other poor saps inside the medical tent. Amazing how close you'll stand next to a complete stranger just to steal their body heat. As usual, lots of different types of runners milling around. Some looking very fit. Others looking like they couldn't run a mile. That's the big secret of the marathon. It doesn't care who you are. You put the training time in, and you'll finish regardless if you have 2% body fat!
For some reason, I got a lot of weird looks at my Amphipod fueling belt. Every marathon I almost scratch wearing the damn thing. It's bulky, heavy and uncomfortable. But, I yet again opted to race with it. I guess the experience of running my first marathon without anything other than water and a lone cherry popsicle ingrained in me that it's better to trust your own gear instead of betting there'll be stuff left at the aid stations when you get to them.
My breath was taken away as the sun came up. Just beautiful to watch. Something out of a Fall postcard. I was thankful for my racing sunglasses when the national anthem was being sung. It'd been a long year. Lots of tough stuff. Lots of injuries. Lots of doubts if I'd even make it to a start line somewhere to run a race. The tears felt warmer than they should've as I wiped them back.
I got the iPod fired up, turned on the app on my iPhone that I was going to use to let my family and friends track my progress and looked up to throw a high five to dad somewhere way up there in the clouds where the good seats are. Yes, it was time to do this! The gun went off and the group was off. Much smaller field than I was used to at Rochester.
First things first. This was my race. So, all of you sprinters are not going to fool me into keeping up with you. I settled into my warm up mile. The wind was even colder outside of the packs of stranger warmth from the start line. But, I knew from experience that I'd warm up quickly enough. It was decision time. I had two choices. Run according to how I felt regardless of any pace? Or, since I was probably going to suffer anyways because of my less than stellar training, try to hold onto that magical pace that gave me last year's triumphant 3:57 finish time? I decided that I was going to enjoy the suffering. They'll be no running according to how I felt. This wasn't a 26.2 mile long distance training run. It was a race. Like they say, to give anything other than your best, is a waste of the gift! Right?
Empire is advertised as being a flat marathon course. But, when compared to Rochester, the elevation change is very similar. Rochester isn't a flat course. After the first few miles, I knew that the website lied. Flat! If this was flat, then I'd hate to see what the race directors thought was hilly! But, it wasn't all that bad.
Right from the beginning my legs weren't doing very good. They felt dead, sore and tired. I shook my head and wondered why the hell I decided to do this stupid thing! One of the funny things about me and my distance running is, that now a days, it takes me between four to six miles to truly warm up. Yeah that sounds weird to shorter distance runners. Even stupid me fell prey to my irrational fears and forgot this important fact.
Mile five is right around the time that I remembered the warm up thing. My dead legs came suddenly on line and the soreness disappeared. I started clocking miles in the 8:40ish range and inwardly screamed at myself to slow the hell down and save it for the last six miles where the real race is! Stop racing like a new marathoner!
But, they just kept on coming regardless of my efforts to calm down. As I approached mile eight, I knew that this was where the steeper hills were advertised to be in the race. These would most definitely slow me down. My friend Chris recently told me about a hill racing technique and over the last three weeks I gave it a try. It worked beautifully during training and I began to use it now. My pace slowed a little. But, I felt great as I crested the hills to the dismay of other runners. I was surprised to be challenged quite a bit on hills through miles eight, 10 and 13. Each time though, I used the technique and blew my challengers away! Man there's nothing more defeating than to have someone blow your socks off up an incline! It was awesome to be that guy for once! Halfway through the race the official clock read 1:55! Ten to fifteen minutes ahead of where I thought I would be? I felt freaking amazing! Still had another half marathon to go though. Focus.
The next several miles proved to me that racing with my fuel belt that day was the right choice. Sports drink was supposed to be at every water station. But, all I kept seeing was clear water. The gel packs advertised to be at mile seven and 14 were also a no show. Not even a cherry popsicle to be found! It may be heavy bulky and funny looking. But, I had my stuff and I was fueled! Funny looking or not!
As I approached mile 16 I thought to myself, this is it. This is the longest distance that I ran in training. All those sub 9:00 miles are going to go out the window and I'm going to hit the wall.
Mile, 17, 18, 19, 20. They came and went without any fatigue and without any walls. What the hell was going on? I've never felt like this? I felt calm, controlled and most importantly was RACING! Out of 10 marathons, even my magical race last year, every one of them always felt like a battle against how much tightness, cramping and fatigue I could take. It always was a war of attrition with my body. Not this time. I was consistently passing people on the flats, on the hills, even the dudes with the Ironman tattoos and racing club jerseys got good views of my backside!
They say that a marathon is a 20 mile run followed up with a 6.2 race. It's typically a lot like that. The toughest part for me, when the battle was decided in past races, was always in those last grueling miles. It was then, at that moment that I made the decision to honor what I was given that morning. My Garmin's mile splits were all over the place when I passed the official race mile markers. They Garmin's miles were either registering a quarter mile too early or a quarter mile too late. But, I'd been watching my average pace times closely. If I held on for the remainder of the race, I may be able to actually come close to another sub four hour race time. Just unbelievable!
The rest of the race, was my friends as they say, history. I never let my pace fall below 9:00 again. As I rounded that last turn, saw that crowd, heard the roar I knew this was the best race of my life. I ran by my family quickly slapping some high fives. I glanced at the clock as I approached the finish line 3:52? That can't be right? My weight gain? My injuries? All the stress? All the shitty training?
As I crossed that line and had that medal placed around my neck there wasn't the emotion of last year's experience. Honestly, think that I was in shock. I felt amazing! I felt like I could've run even more miles. Did I just really run a marathon? Or was this some kind of weird dream in the hotel room? No friends, it was quite real. 3:52:26 real! I basked in that reality for the rest of the day.
Sometimes, we beat ourselves up. We need to eat less garbage. We need to drink less. We need to make more money or work less. We need to stop watching too much TV or spending hours living virtually online instead of in the real world. We need to work out more. We need to run farther, faster and more often. The list is endless. Sometimes though, victories are won not by drastic changes. But, by dedication and determination of everyday people who put the work in regardless of how challenging their circumstances are.
There was a time in my life when I thought that a sub four hour marathon was something that I'd never be able to do. As I crossed that finish line on Sunday I was a changed man. It was a new world. Impossible things can happen if you put the work in. Life and distance running are the same. Yes, there are good days. Yes, there are bad days. But, as long as you believe in the path that you've chosen and continually work towards your goals, you will succeed. Some of the most successful people and athletes in the world have done one thing more often than win, they've failed. Yes, that's right. Most people don't realize that because failures are not glamorous, won't make you tons of money or give you an Olympic medal. But, they do serve a purpose. They teach you to get up and try again. Eventually persistence pays off.
As always friends, thank you for reading my words. You honor me. Run for your lives. Be hopeful. Be persistent. Believe you can do anything. Dreams can some true. Sometimes even when you least expect it. Sometimes even twice...
Thankfully, through smart rehab, a good podiatrist and an amazing chiropractor I was able to resurrect what was left of my shot at running a marathon later this year. Unfortunately, Rochester was still out of the question after missing out on two solid months of regular marathon training. I scoured the internet and discovered the Empire State Marathon in Syracuse, NY. Lots of pluses about that race. It was only a little over an hour away from home, cost around the same as Rochester and held during a time frame that I thought I could theoretically train up to.
But, the mind is a terrible thing when you're coming off a running injury. Lots of doubts. When talking to an older friend last year about my 40th birthday this year, they adamantly told me that my running days were coming to an brisk end and that in their experience, EVERYTHING started to go downhill after the big 40. I laughed in their face. I was a runner for God's sake! I wasn't going to break that easy just because of two measly little numbers. Sitting there staring at the register button on Empire's website, I ate every last one of those laughs from that conversation. Things were definitely looking like I was on the downhill slope of old age running decline. To date, I've never been injured so much in one year of running! What the hell?
Like most people, I don't like change. And I certainly didn't want to change to a race and course that I was completely unfamiliar with. After all, I managed to finally break the four hour mark last year in Rochester and this year I was looking forward to trying to do it again. But, it looked like at the time that a sub four hour time just wasn't going to happen this year. Besides, the 366 Project meant emphasis on falling in love with the act, not the race this year. And with the injury's little speed bump, my training was sporadic at best when compared to last year's perfect training season. I even managed to gain seven of the 27 pounds I'd shed back. "Click" Empire it was. I thought to myself, I'll just be happy to get to the starting line healthy and injury free. I did the sub four hour time. I kept telling myself that I didn't need to do it again. It took so much dedication and sacrifice last summer. It was probably not something I could ever do again.
Time to reorganize and get back to business. I threw myself back into a modified training plan at what was left of my season. It was ambitious. It was dirty. It was ugly. Like I said, work commitments and yet another injury, stupid hamstring, made it sporadic. My marathon pace that I so easily clocked every mile training last year left me breathless and exhausted now. The three 20 mile long distance runs noted in last year's running log became just one 16 miler with walk breaks in this year's log. Things were not looking very good. In my experience, running is a lot like life. What you put into it, you get out. All of my lackluster training was going to directly affect the race. In past years with similar shitty training, it turned my marathon into Mark's death shuffle instead of a race. Much suffering.
I refocused and managed to somehow nail the last three weeks of my training plan verbatim. The hamstring strain though, was still there. My chiropractor flat out told me that I shouldn't run Empire. I managed to get my primary doctor to give me a prescription for Prednisone. It helped a little. But, didn't give me the relief that I really needed. Dammit, I was doing this race, injury or not!
As I covered in my pre race report, the trip over to Syracuse was beautiful with Fall foliage in full bloom and more importantly, quick. The expo was fairly decent. And the hotel was better than I expected. I ate a nice dinner with my family who tagged along to watch me suffer the next day for 26.2 miles. Went to bed early. There was nothing else to be done to make this any better than it could be.
After running Rochester for so long, I've taken for granted how nice is it to sleep in your own bed, wake up race morning, eat your own pre long run breakfast and drive 20 minutes to the start line. Man, that's a really nice convenience! I didn't sleep as good as I would've liked. Don't get me wrong, the bed was comfortable. But, I kept worrying that my iPhone alarm and the hotel room alarm weren't going to go off on time. I woke up around 2 AM and even moved my wake up time up by a half an hour to make sure I had enough time to get ready. Only I can make something as simple as sleeping stressful before a race!
I showered, shaved and drove over to a Dunkin Doughnuts across the street for a coffee and wheat bagel with peanut butter. I know. They say not to drink coffee before marathons. I do. I'll even take D & D instead of Starbucks if the situation is drastic enough. There wasn't a Starbucks around. It was a drastic morning. So, D & D it was.
I was happy to see that the cold rain of the night before and 80% chance of rain showers forecasted for the day were gone. It was going to be the coldest marathon I've ever run with clear skies and mid 40's. But, I felt decent and had packed just the right type of running clothing for warm and cold running.
The hotel had a courtesy shuttle running to get runners to the start line. Running two previous NYC marathons has taught me that anytime you can take the stress of getting to the start line off your back, it makes for a much more relaxed experience. It was the last shuttle before the official full marathon start time at 7:30 AM. The driver was prompt and I was amazed to hear him talk about how some runners scheduled for earlier shuttle runs who got down to the lobby five minutes late complained that he left without them. Really? You're five minutes late? How hard is it to get down from the third floor to the lobby?
On the way I chatted with the only other runner on the shuttle. She was an older marathoner who'd originally registered to run the full. But, dropped to the half because of a hamstring injury. Hearing that sent me into a little panic. Christ! I've had the same injury and was still stubbornly planning on limping through the full. I tried to push those self doubts away. But, they stuck with me through the entire race.
We got to the start line with lots of time to spare. It was right outside of some stadium. Lots of great parking if you were lucky enough to drive there. There was little to no wind cover in the parking lot. The winds had picked up overnight as the rain disappeared. Oh, how I longed for a nice warm car! I huddled with some of the other poor saps inside the medical tent. Amazing how close you'll stand next to a complete stranger just to steal their body heat. As usual, lots of different types of runners milling around. Some looking very fit. Others looking like they couldn't run a mile. That's the big secret of the marathon. It doesn't care who you are. You put the training time in, and you'll finish regardless if you have 2% body fat!
For some reason, I got a lot of weird looks at my Amphipod fueling belt. Every marathon I almost scratch wearing the damn thing. It's bulky, heavy and uncomfortable. But, I yet again opted to race with it. I guess the experience of running my first marathon without anything other than water and a lone cherry popsicle ingrained in me that it's better to trust your own gear instead of betting there'll be stuff left at the aid stations when you get to them.
My breath was taken away as the sun came up. Just beautiful to watch. Something out of a Fall postcard. I was thankful for my racing sunglasses when the national anthem was being sung. It'd been a long year. Lots of tough stuff. Lots of injuries. Lots of doubts if I'd even make it to a start line somewhere to run a race. The tears felt warmer than they should've as I wiped them back.
I got the iPod fired up, turned on the app on my iPhone that I was going to use to let my family and friends track my progress and looked up to throw a high five to dad somewhere way up there in the clouds where the good seats are. Yes, it was time to do this! The gun went off and the group was off. Much smaller field than I was used to at Rochester.
First things first. This was my race. So, all of you sprinters are not going to fool me into keeping up with you. I settled into my warm up mile. The wind was even colder outside of the packs of stranger warmth from the start line. But, I knew from experience that I'd warm up quickly enough. It was decision time. I had two choices. Run according to how I felt regardless of any pace? Or, since I was probably going to suffer anyways because of my less than stellar training, try to hold onto that magical pace that gave me last year's triumphant 3:57 finish time? I decided that I was going to enjoy the suffering. They'll be no running according to how I felt. This wasn't a 26.2 mile long distance training run. It was a race. Like they say, to give anything other than your best, is a waste of the gift! Right?
Empire is advertised as being a flat marathon course. But, when compared to Rochester, the elevation change is very similar. Rochester isn't a flat course. After the first few miles, I knew that the website lied. Flat! If this was flat, then I'd hate to see what the race directors thought was hilly! But, it wasn't all that bad.
Right from the beginning my legs weren't doing very good. They felt dead, sore and tired. I shook my head and wondered why the hell I decided to do this stupid thing! One of the funny things about me and my distance running is, that now a days, it takes me between four to six miles to truly warm up. Yeah that sounds weird to shorter distance runners. Even stupid me fell prey to my irrational fears and forgot this important fact.
Mile five is right around the time that I remembered the warm up thing. My dead legs came suddenly on line and the soreness disappeared. I started clocking miles in the 8:40ish range and inwardly screamed at myself to slow the hell down and save it for the last six miles where the real race is! Stop racing like a new marathoner!
But, they just kept on coming regardless of my efforts to calm down. As I approached mile eight, I knew that this was where the steeper hills were advertised to be in the race. These would most definitely slow me down. My friend Chris recently told me about a hill racing technique and over the last three weeks I gave it a try. It worked beautifully during training and I began to use it now. My pace slowed a little. But, I felt great as I crested the hills to the dismay of other runners. I was surprised to be challenged quite a bit on hills through miles eight, 10 and 13. Each time though, I used the technique and blew my challengers away! Man there's nothing more defeating than to have someone blow your socks off up an incline! It was awesome to be that guy for once! Halfway through the race the official clock read 1:55! Ten to fifteen minutes ahead of where I thought I would be? I felt freaking amazing! Still had another half marathon to go though. Focus.
The next several miles proved to me that racing with my fuel belt that day was the right choice. Sports drink was supposed to be at every water station. But, all I kept seeing was clear water. The gel packs advertised to be at mile seven and 14 were also a no show. Not even a cherry popsicle to be found! It may be heavy bulky and funny looking. But, I had my stuff and I was fueled! Funny looking or not!
As I approached mile 16 I thought to myself, this is it. This is the longest distance that I ran in training. All those sub 9:00 miles are going to go out the window and I'm going to hit the wall.
Mile, 17, 18, 19, 20. They came and went without any fatigue and without any walls. What the hell was going on? I've never felt like this? I felt calm, controlled and most importantly was RACING! Out of 10 marathons, even my magical race last year, every one of them always felt like a battle against how much tightness, cramping and fatigue I could take. It always was a war of attrition with my body. Not this time. I was consistently passing people on the flats, on the hills, even the dudes with the Ironman tattoos and racing club jerseys got good views of my backside!
They say that a marathon is a 20 mile run followed up with a 6.2 race. It's typically a lot like that. The toughest part for me, when the battle was decided in past races, was always in those last grueling miles. It was then, at that moment that I made the decision to honor what I was given that morning. My Garmin's mile splits were all over the place when I passed the official race mile markers. They Garmin's miles were either registering a quarter mile too early or a quarter mile too late. But, I'd been watching my average pace times closely. If I held on for the remainder of the race, I may be able to actually come close to another sub four hour race time. Just unbelievable!
The rest of the race, was my friends as they say, history. I never let my pace fall below 9:00 again. As I rounded that last turn, saw that crowd, heard the roar I knew this was the best race of my life. I ran by my family quickly slapping some high fives. I glanced at the clock as I approached the finish line 3:52? That can't be right? My weight gain? My injuries? All the stress? All the shitty training?
As I crossed that line and had that medal placed around my neck there wasn't the emotion of last year's experience. Honestly, think that I was in shock. I felt amazing! I felt like I could've run even more miles. Did I just really run a marathon? Or was this some kind of weird dream in the hotel room? No friends, it was quite real. 3:52:26 real! I basked in that reality for the rest of the day.
Sometimes, we beat ourselves up. We need to eat less garbage. We need to drink less. We need to make more money or work less. We need to stop watching too much TV or spending hours living virtually online instead of in the real world. We need to work out more. We need to run farther, faster and more often. The list is endless. Sometimes though, victories are won not by drastic changes. But, by dedication and determination of everyday people who put the work in regardless of how challenging their circumstances are.
There was a time in my life when I thought that a sub four hour marathon was something that I'd never be able to do. As I crossed that finish line on Sunday I was a changed man. It was a new world. Impossible things can happen if you put the work in. Life and distance running are the same. Yes, there are good days. Yes, there are bad days. But, as long as you believe in the path that you've chosen and continually work towards your goals, you will succeed. Some of the most successful people and athletes in the world have done one thing more often than win, they've failed. Yes, that's right. Most people don't realize that because failures are not glamorous, won't make you tons of money or give you an Olympic medal. But, they do serve a purpose. They teach you to get up and try again. Eventually persistence pays off.
As always friends, thank you for reading my words. You honor me. Run for your lives. Be hopeful. Be persistent. Believe you can do anything. Dreams can some true. Sometimes even when you least expect it. Sometimes even twice...
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